Feb 19, 2014

Disney's Agenda

Posted by with 3 comments
I should be in bed, fast asleep. I know I should. But I kept having these thoughts in my head that needed to be addressed. I was trying to fight it, but then the baby woke up wanting to eat and I figured - since I was out of bed, I might as well get this done so my head can relax and maybe then I can sleep.



Dear Well-Behaved Mormon Woman,

Earlier this evening my husband pointed me towards your blog post about Disney's newest movie, Frozen having an agenda about homosexuality. I'll be honest, I didn't read it all the way through - I got bored. Well that, and I was at Instacare waiting for a strep test (it came back positive). I did read enough to know that I am offended however. I am offended that you didn't do more 'research' and realize that ALL Disney movies have agendas. I have yet to see Frozen, not that I haven't wanted to - it just hasn't happened for us yet. That aside, here's a few agendas you've forgotten. Feel free to do blog posts on any of the following. I'd love to see them.

SNOW WHITE & THE SEVEN DWARFS - Breaking And Entering Is Totally Cool.
You've got people that want to kill you? Go ahead and break into the first abandoned home you find. If you're lucky you'll run into complete strangers that are cool with you breaking and entering and they'll totally make you their maid! SIGN ME UP!!!

PINOCCHIO - Do What You Want, It Doesn't Matter, No One Cares And You'll Still Be Totally Okay.
Pinocchio was all about making the wrong choices, wasn't he? Skipping school, hanging out with strangers, going to strange places with said strangers, smoking, gambling and oh, he had a blast didn't he?

BAMBI  - Hunting Is A Manly Man's Privilege, Animals Are Replaceable.
What in the world are animals doing running around in the wild? They should all be hunted and killed for pleasure and hey, you need more space for your human activities? Burn down a forest, even if it's an accident it's a happy accident.

CINDERELLA - Children Should Be Seen, Not Heard And When It Means You Can Be Lazy - Make Them Serve You, Because After All It's Okay To Be Vain.
All of my children are my little servants as well. I sit on the couch eating bon-bons all day while they slave away. I can't ruin my perfect hair or body or hands. I have to look perfect when Mr. Right comes calling at the door.

PETER PAN - Never Grow Up
Growing up is so boring, then you have to do responsible things, like actually go to sleep at night and eat with some sort of schedule. Also it means less play time with the boys.

LADY AND THE TRAMP - Fall In Love With Whomever You Please, It'll All Work Out In The End
Pay no attention that your crush is from the wrong side of the tracks. He's a handsome little devil and you should make him your own. It helps if there's a plate of spaghetti involved.

SLEEPING BEAUTY - Involve Yourself In The Occult
Witches, dark magic, horrible spells...It has it all.

101 DALMATIONS - Wear Fur. White Fur With Perfect Black Spots. Do Not Spay/Neuter Pets.
Everyone wants to wear the best fur available, especially when they know it comes from Dalmations and there is absolutely NO NEED to spay and neuter your animals because gosh, everyone wants a plantation of dogs running around.

MARY POPPINS - Magic Nanny's Exist
Don't want to clean your room, that's okay - when you have a magic nanny she just teaches you the right way to use her magic and you only have to lift a tiny, little finger.

THE RESCUERS - Orphans Are Dirty
No one wants an orphan, except for jewel thieves. The only friends a poor orphan can really have are a set of mice and we all know that mice are dirty little creatures - ergo, orphans are dirty.

THE FOX AND THE HOUND - Never Befriend Someone Of Another Race/Color. It'll Never Work Out.
Yup, we should all just stick to the people we're familiar with. The people in the past were so spot on with this agenda.

THE LITTLE MERMAID - Disobedience And Stealing - Lessons Every Teen Needs To Know.
Teens always listen to their parents, always. There's nothing wrong with stealing when you call it 'collecting'.

BEAUTY AND THE BEAST - It's Okay To Befriend Wild, Hairy Animals - Maybe Even Fall In Love.
I think the all the heterosexual women in the world really got swayed by this agenda. Most women I know fell in love with and married a wild, hairy animal. Guess we really need to address this issue.

ALADDIN - Stealing And Taking Drugs Are The Way To The Princess' Heart.
Aladdin was a thief, we know that. But he was also a druggie. Genie was just a hallucination and the whole magic carpet ride, meeting and falling in love with a princess - it was all just a sweet, drug induced coma.

LION KING - Kill Everyone You Know To Make It To The Top.
Kill your brother, send your nephew packing, turn your back on the friends who helped you get to the top and when your nephew returns to kill you, you will think to yourself, "Ah, I taught him well."

TOY STORY - If You're Gay, Act Tough And Macho And No One Will Know.
Can't you just feel the sexual tension between Buzz and Woody. UGH. And oh my gosh! They sleep in the SAME toy chest at night. The NERVE!

THE HUNCHBACK OF NOTRE DAME - Gypsies Are Evil. They Will Always Be Evil. 
How can you trust anyone that moves around so much, dances all the time and has a pet goat? The shame.

HERCULES - Worship False Gods.
There is no Heavenly Father and Satan. Only Zeus and Hades and a whole slew of other gods who make this world pleasant or painful for us.

MULAN - Disobey and Become A Cross-Dresser.
Again, even teen likes to obey. And every teen should dress according to their gender.

TANGLED - Your Hair Is Magical, Never Cut It.
All those chics walking around with pixie cuts are ruined forever. Their magical powers are gone, gone I tell you. Oh wait, maybe their magic is only in their tears. Either way we need to get rid of the magic. Magic is a bad thing.

I could go on, but I'm tired. Those were just a 'few' agendas I thought of quickly. Yes, they are as ridiculous as they sound. No, I'm not serious about anything I just said. I think your post is just as silly. After seeing the movie 1 time you already had it in your head that there was an agenda to it - so of course, when you see it 2 and 3 times you'll find more information to back up YOUR AGENDA.

I really give kudos to you for standing up for something you believe in, I seriously do. But, I feel bad you're going to be standing alone. Although I guess you're not technically 'alone'. You said you had one friend that agreed with you. Not family and friendS, friend. I hope you two enjoy each other and the dark things you find in this world.

My family, friends and I prefer to find the good in the world. So even if Disney has agenda's written into their movies (most of which kids won't get until they're grown, anyway), we choose to seek the 'beautiful and lovely' things of the world. We prefer to see these kinds of messages:

SNOW WHITE & THE SEVEN DWARFS - Strangers Helping Strangers (The Good Samaritan)

PINOCCHIO - Learn From Your Mistakes

BAMBI  - Animals Are God's Creation

CINDERELLA - There Is Good In The World
And no, my children really ARE NOT treated as servants. If anything, they treat me as a servant.

PETER PAN - Childhood Is Only Fun For So Long, Family Is Important

LADY AND THE TRAMP - Never Judge A Book By It's Cover

SLEEPING BEAUTY - Evil Is Tricky, You Need To Be On Guard At All Times, Innocence

101 DALMATIONS - Animal Rights

MARY POPPINS - While Magic Nanny's Don't Exist, There Are Lots Of Lessons To Learn. (Cleaning is more enjoyable if you finds ways to make it fun)
I'm still working on this one, but it's still what I choose to take away.

THE RESCUERSJesus Said Love Everyone

THE FOX AND THE HOUNDMake Friends Wherever You Go - You Never Know When You Might Need Them Again

THE LITTLE MERMAID - Rely On Good Friends For Help, Don't Be Afraid To Admit Your Mistakes, Be Open And Honest With Your Loved Ones.

BEAUTY AND THE BEAST - Love Others That Are Different. There Is Always Something Super Special About Them.
BTW - I absolutely love my wild, hairy animal of a husband. He's my best friend.

ALADDINEven If Life's Dealt You A Nasty Hand, You Can Make A Better Life For Yourself, Honesty.

LION KING - Your Family Is Always There For You (The Prodigal Son)

TOY STORYTrue Friendship Never Ends

THE HUNCHBACK OF NOTRE DAME - Love And Accept People's Disabilities, God Made Each Of Us Special, Everyone Needs To Feel Loved

HERCULESLearn Who You Are And What You're Made Of. Never Forget Who You Are.

MULAN - Loyalty, The Value Of Family And Love, Courage

TANGLED Stand Up For Yourself, Remember Where You Come From

And from what I've heard about FROZEN, it's also all about FAMILY!

If you want to believe that Disney has a homosexual agenda with Frozen, go on and keep believing it. You're entitled to your opinions. All I'm trying to say is that you can find darkness anywhere if you look for it. I did it in about 10 minutes.

And please, don't write some funky blog post about the movies I mentioned above. If you do, I may just have to write another middle of the night passive-aggressive letter to you.

                                                                                                     Sincerely,
          The Passive-Aggressive, Not As Great A Christian As I Know I Should Be, Sleep Deprived Woman


3 comments:

  1. Excellently said! And I think you are a fantastic Christian so don't let anyone tell you any different ;)

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  2. Oh my goodness what a way to wake up, I was giggling throughout! And I just found out that Peter Pan used to be known to take children to Neverland and that was the children's heaven. I never use that now I see Peter Pan in a whole new light. I believe that if we look for the dark and evil it's not hard to find especially these days - however what a dreary life if we were to always do that. Oh and I would love to know how you get your kids to do all chores and just watch them while I'm eating bon bon's.

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  3. I read that blog post too and couldn't believe it! I love your post!

    ReplyDelete

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